I don't know whether careful thought has been put over the significance of mehmani, but it is indeed extremely vital for all of us to understand that a mehmani, no matter how big or small, is an expression of love by the murid for the Imam. It is even more important to realise that a mehmani, when taken to jamakhana, is actually being presented to the Imam in that particular jamatkhana.
Let us digress and picture this scenario: You have warmly invited a loved one to your house. He or she comes but then insults you in your very own house. What will be your reaction, as an ordinary human being? Not very positive, I am sure.
But this is the Imam, the Lord of the worlds! He has warmly invited us, His loved ones to His house. Do we have any right to go to His own house and then insult Him?
By now I am sure you know where I am going with this post. A mehmani is an expression of love which we want to present to our Imam and make Him happy. Is it therefore not surprising that we prepare mehmanis with such wonderful and noble intentions and then, at the very moment of presentation to our Beloved, end up insulting Him instead of making Him happy? I say this because this is what I have observed for years and years and years, in fact for over 40 years now, happening in jamatkhanas in many parts of the world. Murids lovingly prepare mehmanis for the Imam but then DO NOT FOLLOW THROUGH. By this, I mean, it is not enough to just bring mehmanis to jamatkhana and leave them there. Since this is a matter of love, is it not correct to say that we have to be particular about every aspect of the mehmani, right up to the presentation in the jamatkhana?
Let us digress and picture yet another scenario: it is Valentine's Day and the one whom you love has thought of you and has taken the pain to go and search for your favourite flowers and your favourite chocolates. When he or she rings your doorbell that evening, you rush to open the door in excitement and then a bunch of flowers and the chocolates are thrust at you, wrapped in crumpled, dirty, old newspaper picked from the ground. What will be your emotions at that particular moment?
I am sure it is obvious now that I am very, very upset about the handling of mehmanis in jamatkhanas today. Mehmanis brought to jamatkhana are dumped in smelly tupperwares, old tin and plastic plates full of cracks and with battered looking appearances (see photograph below) or even worse, put into black mini garbage bags (I refuse to call them paperbags) and then taken inside jamatkhana where they are unceremoniously dumped in the nandi area.
I cannot dare to analyse why sevaadhaaris placed in charge of receiving mehmanis in jamatkhanas would handle such important offerings in such a cavalier manner. I also cannot dare to analyse why jamati Mukhi-Kamadia Sahebs and especially Mukhiani-Kamadianimas do not ever bother to see how jamati mehmanis are being presented to our Imam inside the jamatkhana. I would have thought that it is the primary mandate of the jamati Mukhi-Kamadia Sahebs and Mukhiani-Kamadianimas to ensure that all mehmanis are presented to the Imam in a worthy manner. The Imam is the King and all dishes presented to Him (symbolical presentation is as important as physical presentation) should be done so properly, in exquisite plates and dishes. And yet to date, I have not come across any such revered leaders of the jamat who have paid any attention to the handling of jamati mehmanis. Even worse, after showing them the kinds of dishes used by the volunteers outside and protesting against the use of such unworthy utensils (believe me, some of them cannot be used to feed our pets in!), they have just turned a blind eye and ignored the issue. Or else, given flimsy excuses such as the cost of the exquisite dishes and issues of mishandling and breakage. But this is the Imam, the Lord. Of course, expensive dishes cannot be entrusted to jamati members to take home in advance BUT they can be used to transfer the mehmanis into, once these are brought to the jamatkhana. And if some dishes break, so what? Umedvaars with big hearts are there and if one dish breaks, two will be bought in its place. So why carry on in this pathetic manner?
That is why, today in this post, I am appealing to each of my fellow brothers and sisters, my fellow murids, to take up the initiative: FOLLOW THROUGH WITH YOUR MEHMANIS. Please do not just bring them and dump them with the volunteers. Take the pain, a few minutes, to see how your mehmani is being prepared for presentation to the Imam. Say NO to any unworthy utensil being used. INSIST on a proper dish being brought for your mehmani. Say NO to paper (mini garbage) bags. If this happens, then inshallah, a change will come about and finally, I will see the abolition of these horrible plastic and tin dishes and Tupperware – I hope they are all burnt in a festive bonfire! – and the finer dishes will be unearthed from the stores, where at the moment, they are all gathering dust.
The point of my indignation is that we do not just say “jamat ke hai-zinda” just for the sake of it. We believe in it with conviction. The Imam IS present in the jamatkhana and He IS receiving our mehmanis, expressions of our love for Him. If we could see the Imam with our physical eyes seated there on the stage in jamatkhana every morning and every evening, would anyone dare to present mehmanis in tupperwares, plastic plates and paperbags to Him?
Let it be clear that this post is not about Sufro. It is also not about the size of the mehmani. Whatever we feel like presenting to the Imam out of love, we can present to Him. But it should be done so properly, not in an insulting manner.
Also, I do not wish mehmanis to be confused with nandi. Once the jamatkhana ceremonies are over and the mehmanis have been presented to the Imam, then they are taken for nandi and at that time, anything can be done for convenience. They can be put in paperbags or tupperwares which are easy to carry home, etc. But NOT during jamatkhana time. ALL mehmanis, big and small, MUST be placed in front of the Imam in a manner WORTHY of Him.
I would very much like to hear the opinions of my brothers and sisters on this matter. Do you agree? Is it right for offerings to be taken into jamatkhana in paperbags and ugly old plastic plates and Tupperware? Or is this preposterous and should be changed? I hope my brothers and sisters will have the courage to comment truthfully.
We have a lot to learn from our Hindu brothers and sisters and from Christians and Jews as well. Go once to any mandir and see how the food offerings are placed in front of the Idols. Are they placed in boxes or paperbags? NEVER! Sure, some devotees bring mithai in boxes but the Prohit makes sure those offerings are placed in the best gold and silver thaalis before being offered to the Lord. So why can we not show similar devotion, is the million-dollar question.
Mehmani is a blessing. It is a unique opportunity and it will continue forever and ever. Dua, Dasond, other rituals will stop one day but mehmani will never ever be stopped because even God Himself cannot deny a murid his expressions of love. After all, is it not true that each and every one of us would dearly like to invite our Beloved Imam to our homes for a loving meal? If this were to come true, would we set our table with dirty, broken, cracked plastic and tin plates and present our food in Tupperwares??! Do we even use such dishes ourselves at home for our own personal meals? Then how can we use such dishes for the Imam? Let us immediately stop insulting Him and treating mehmanis in a demeaning manner.
With Ya Ali Madad.
...Just kidding !!